Displacement and uncertainty: where's "home"?
In the middle of Week Two of living in a motel. Now over in a Super 8 next to the freeway in El Cerrito, about 20 minutes from campus if there's no traffic.
The leaks? Confirmed not from my house.
The cracks? Getting bigger, wider, longer.
The neighbors? Very supportive and caring...
Day in, day out, I think of displacement and uncertainty, about homelessness, abrupt change, and the uncertainty of the future.
My situation in no way whatsoever mirrors the devastating losses of those who fled flood, who fled war, who were forcibly evacuated, 'disappeared', or shipped away.
What is common to this experience is the loss of home, no matter how temporary. The loss of dependence on everydayness, the loss of taken-for-granted routine. The loss of chance encounters with neighbors and friends, the easy socializing that is so much of neighborhood life. The loss of control over basic parts of life.
The desire to turn back the clock, no matter how fanciful, frequently intrudes. The sense of dislocation -- that others can continue their lives when mine is so disrupted, and WHY don't they notice?! -- permeates everything.
The uncertainty of when normalness will be recovered. If it will be accompanied by a sense of security that the best possible "fix" has been done.
The importance of communication, even when there is, especially when there is ambiguity.
Random thoughts...inescapable. I just want to go home.
The leaks? Confirmed not from my house.
The cracks? Getting bigger, wider, longer.
The neighbors? Very supportive and caring...
Day in, day out, I think of displacement and uncertainty, about homelessness, abrupt change, and the uncertainty of the future.
My situation in no way whatsoever mirrors the devastating losses of those who fled flood, who fled war, who were forcibly evacuated, 'disappeared', or shipped away.
What is common to this experience is the loss of home, no matter how temporary. The loss of dependence on everydayness, the loss of taken-for-granted routine. The loss of chance encounters with neighbors and friends, the easy socializing that is so much of neighborhood life. The loss of control over basic parts of life.
The desire to turn back the clock, no matter how fanciful, frequently intrudes. The sense of dislocation -- that others can continue their lives when mine is so disrupted, and WHY don't they notice?! -- permeates everything.
The uncertainty of when normalness will be recovered. If it will be accompanied by a sense of security that the best possible "fix" has been done.
The importance of communication, even when there is, especially when there is ambiguity.
Random thoughts...inescapable. I just want to go home.